To me, you are perfect.

Thoughts that came during the holidays...

I don't like to watch movies over and over. I own maybe two DVDs, and they are of great movies that I truly adore and would decide to watch every couple of years. Then there are the three movies that I can think of at the moment that I could sit down and watch anytime, even if I just saw it the previous week. Before Sunset, Clueless, and Love Actually. Love Actually had me at hello, from the first frames that played across the screen in the theater four years ago. Few things have touched me in a movie like those scenes of the airport reunions, which were filmed from real life I've since discovered. And I think often of what you hear Hugh Grant say over those first few scenes...

"Whenever I get gloomy with the state of the world, I think about the arrivals gate at Heathrow Airport. General opinion's starting to make out that we live in a world of hatred and greed, but I don't see that. It seems to me that love is everywhere. Often it's not particularly dignified or newsworthy, but it's always there - fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, husbands and wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, old friends. When the planes hit the Twin Towers, as far as I know none of the phone calls from the people on board were messages of hate or revenge - they were all messages of love. If you look for it, I've got a sneaking suspicion love actually is all around."



Maybe these words sounds unoriginal or cheesy, but I think it's easy to forget the message, that there is more love than not in the world. Civilization is not drowning in a sea of celebrity obsession and war and political turmoil. Spending too much time watching the news or surfing Perez Hilton will have you thinking otherwise. But don't be fooled.

Another thought that came over Christmastime...

I might have finally gathered the words, from my and others' observations this year, to explain why 'tis better to give than to receive. Receiving is definitely a joy, but it is passive. It hardly requires any work on our part. Giving, for me and for many, asks that you think of someone else, put yourself in their shoes, and try to discern their needs, wants, taste, style, etc. It can take a little vulnerability, if you are someone who cares that the receiver likes their gift. In giving, you reflect who you are as well; you may be reflecting your own tastes and also how well you know the receiver. So, the process of thinking outside yourself, aiming to please, and working to make the receiver feel known all make up the feeling of fulfillment in giving a gift. In my small group we did a Secret Santa gift exchange. Everyone got the neatest presents. But it was clear that the process of selecting and then giving had done more to bond us than the actual opening of the presents themselves.